Overcoming Grief.

Written by Lee Stevenson, sorry I am not the best editor.

Ambiguous grief (morning) occurs when we experience a loss whether it be of a broken marriage, broken friendship, loss of a job, loss of money, loss of our home, even if we have to move this can cause ambiguous grief. As things wind down we are going to experience this type of grief more and more the bible warns people will not be loyal and will be ill tempered and selfish. It is normal to experience this grief. But because it can deeply effect our ability to think and can effect our health we will need to learn to get over this grief as quickly as we can. I am going to try to discuss how we can do this. It is not easy and ambiguous grief is the most difficult to deal with. The reason for this is , is because you do not have closure. It often times will get people second guessing or blaming themselves for things that may have happened. We are all imperfect and make errors. It is why we were commanded to forgive one another. If we error and repented and the person did not respond in a way that would please God. Then we did the best we can. We cannot expect anyone to be perfect and not error. To expect ourselves or others to not error is unreasonable. Grief is going to occur on a much larger scale very soon so we need to prepare and learn to recover as quickly as we can. It is very hard and it does leave scars but God will heal all those scars in the new system. Studies have shown when we are grieving a chemical is produced in the body that can damage the heart. So it is very important to do our best to try and recover as soon as possible but don’t be unreasonable with ourselves on how soon we recover from grief. We do need to leave ourselves experience it. Burying grief and ignoring it can be just as unhealthy.

Those who love God and want to draw closer when they error they will repent and take steps to prevent those types of errors from happening again. If they do it shows they love God and are trying to please him. If we or , someone else does not forgive someones error when they have repented then their errors will not be forgiven. If a person is not forgiving this tells you something about their heart condition and not yours. Many will experience financial loss, loss of friends, or even marriage, loss of property or homes, when things are very near the end we will even lose our places of worship. We need to build our foundation on the chief corner stone Jesus who God appointed as our king. If we build our identity with the things of the world, whether it be our jobs, our wealth , our reputation, or even who we know when those things are gone then the foundation of our identity is gone meaning we have to build a new identity. This would show we do not have a solid foundation and our figurative house could be easily swept away. If we base our identity on trusting and having faith in Jesus and God then we have a solid foundation because God and Jesus do not change and they do not go back on their word.

Jesus had warned us about building our house on a solid foundation. We will endure figurative storms and floods. The bible even warned those who followed Jesus could expect to endure much trials and tribulations. We are told the one who endures to the end will be the ones who are saved. Building our house on a solid foundation and putting our trust in God and Jesus will help us through the grief when the figurative storms or floods come. We are also told it will help us to maintain peace during those trials. This will be an inner peace as Jesus had when he endured trials, tribulation and persecution.

As this system winds down broken homes will become common, lost income, famine, loss of property and homes, loss of friendships, loss of the life styles we are used to will be gone. Keep in mind this is all temporary and the things in the new system will be much much better and they are forever. The bible tells us there will be no more death, no more tears of sadness, it tells us before we are finished calling out to God in prayer he will answer our prayers in the new system.

The bible told us these things would occur. Even those we were close to would start to have doubts and start turning to the world for answers to the problems that arise as things are winding down. They will have doubts. When they start putting worldly things before spiritual , especially if they start being scoffers we need to be cautious. All the evidence this system is rapidly winding down are in place. Many we care about will fall away from God. They may even turn on us and become enraged because of our faith and trust in God. We need to prepare mentally for this because I learned from experience their attacks are not always obvious when they try and bring you around to their way of thinking. When they cannot manipulate or trick you they get very angry. The bible told us to stay alert and always be ready especially as the things were were told to watch for as signs our redemption is near would occur. As things get tougher this is not bad times it is a sign that very soon the new system will be here and much much happier times are near.

The closer we get to the end of this system the more Jesus will reveal the intentions of peoples heart. It is going to hurt when some things we did not know about someone we cared about gets exposed and we see their true nature. But the closer we get to the end of this system the clearer the distinction will be between those who love God and those who love Jesus will be. Those who love God will get treated worse and worse and people will even grow to hate them. Do not let this discourage you better times are near.

We know many will put their trust and faith in things of the world instead of God. The closer we come to the end of this system the more obvious it will come to tell who loves God and who puts their faith and trust in the world. Those who put the their trust in the world will grow angry and even start to hate those who put their trust in God and Jesus. This will cause us to grow apart from people we deeply care about . It is best to find out who the ones who put their faith in the world because these ones will betray those who put their faith in God and even hand them over when true worship is banned and they are trying to get everyone to accept the mark of the beast. This will cause us a lot of hurt and unresolved emotions. It is best to keep looking forward knowing you tried your best but these things will occur and you are only human and that God and Jesus will make matters right very soon. These things will even effect some of our spiritual relatives and family we are very fond of. As the distinction between those who love God and those who love the world because clearer and clearer the more you will be hated and even attacked. The attacks by Satan and his people are not obvious. This is why we were warned not to be surprised when we suffer tribulation. We will go through some very tough things. The things we endure will cause ambiguous grief. The closer you get to God the more the world and those who are part of the world will hate you. So this also causes ambiguous grief. We need to learn to recover quickly so it will help protect our thinking and our health. Changes are going to occur and for many of us already have occurred. Grief is normal and we should grieve. But after we grieve we should not second guess and think what if I did this or that. If we made an error we need to move on, once we have repented. Those errors can cause changes in our life that cause ambiguous grief. Once we have repented God has forgiven us. We have to move on and do the things God would require for example try to maintain our health, take in his work and write it on our hearts. Provide for our friend, family, and spiritual relatives if we can. Some of us have nothing to share. But when possible we can offer our services. Also helping others can help us get over the grieving sooner. Teaching and sharing God’s word and discussing it with others can help us to get over the grieving sooner. King David made some errors that caused his son Absalom to become disobedient. The eventually led to Absalom’s death. King David was in mourning for an excessive amount of time. Most likely partly because of his guilt from knowing that his disobedience to God led to Absalom following his disobedience. David repented but the effects on his family became very clear. David was holding onto the grief too long and it had started to negatively effect Israel. David left his grief blind him to the fact that he was not giving attention to those who loved him and was grieving for the one who actually would have killed David and many of his friends. David had to be reminded. When David returned to Israel he had a lot of work he had to do to straighten out what his error had caused and he even had to forgive some who opposed him and repented after he had finished grieving and started to move forward with his life and the work God had given him to do.

So whether the grieving was from our error or someone elses we need to learn to move on and not let us forget that God, Jesus and others love us. If we let the grief overwhelm us we will not see the love and other happiness that is there for us. If we grieve too long it can even cause us to start to hate things we used to love. This can start a downward spiral that can draw us away from God. Often times we cannot get over things like this alone. We need to find the support of others who have endured the type of grief we may be experiencing. Associating with spiritual family and talking to them can also help. Reading God’s word and keeping our hopes on the future promises can also help us to recover from the grieving much sooner. If our identity is build on a solid foundation which is Jesus , it can help us to recover more quickly from the losses that may cause us grief. We should keep in mind all these things are temporary and will be gone soon but the things in the new system are forever so storing up treasures in heaven and doing our best to enter the narrow gate will give us hope in a much brighter and happier future where there will be no more sadness, suffering , violence, hatred, greed and many other things that cause grief and suffering. If something has occurred to us that has caused us grief we can be sure God’s justice is righteous and he will set matters straight. If we can hang on just a little while longer we will even be able to see loved ones we have lost in death again very soon.

We will suffer losses and changes that will cause grief but we need to pray to God on it, read his word. Have faith he will guide us through it. Any anxieties caused by things that cause us grief or tribulation we need to trust he will get us through it. Keep in mind this is all temporary. The bible tells us nothing can separate us from the love of God and the love of Jesus. Jesus showed us how much he cared by giving a ransom for our sins so they could be forgiven. The bible also tells us to throw our anxieties on God because he cares. When things do not go as quickly as we may like we may need to be patient and realize God’s timing is the best. Often times the trials and tribulations we experience may expose the true heart condition of those around us or it may expose things we need to work on to draw closer to him. These trials and tribulations we endure can teach us many things if we lean on God and try our best to imitate Jesus while enduring them. Most of all while enduring them persevere in prayer and study of Gods word. Often times he will have scriptures stand out to you as you read them that can help guide you through your trials and tribulation and help you recover from the grief much sooner. Many of us have endured many of these things. Those who have , have been tempered and trained, this can benefit others because those who have endured many of the things I mentioned can help to guide and comfort others as they endure trials, tribulation and grief. We need to be prepared and not expect anything from God. He will answer our prayers in a way that is best for everyone. I have found out through experience to keep an open mind because my prayers were not answered the way I had thought they would be but the way he answered my prayers either benefited the most people or they imparted new knowledge to me or they even imparted knowledge to me that had built up areas in my life that I was as strong as I needed to be.

(2 Timothy 3:1-7) 3 But know this, that in the last days critical times hard to deal with will be here. ² For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, haughty, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, disloyal, ³ having no natural affection, not open to any agreement, slanderers, without self-control, fierce, without love of goodness, ⁴ betrayers, headstrong, puffed up with pride, lovers of pleasures rather than lovers of God, ⁵ having an appearance of godliness but proving false to its power; and from these turn away. ⁶ From among these arise men who slyly work their way into households and captivate weak women loaded down with sins, led by various desires, ⁷ always learning and yet never able to come to an accurate knowledge of truth.

(2 Peter 3:2-7) . . .. ³ First of all know this, that in the last days ridiculers will come with their ridicule, proceeding according to their own desires ⁴ and saying: “Where is this promised presence of his? Why, from the day our forefathers fell asleep in death, all things are continuing exactly as they were from creation’s beginning.” ⁵ For they deliberately ignore this fact, that long ago there were heavens and an earth standing firmly out of water and in the midst of water by the word of God; ⁶ and that by those means the world of that time suffered destruction when it was flooded with water. ⁷ But by the same word the heavens and the earth that now exist are reserved for fire and are being kept until the day of judgment and of destruction of the ungodly people

Matthew 24:13  But the one who has endured to the end will be saved. 14 And this good news of the Kingdom will be preached in all the inhabited earth for a witness to all the nations, and then the end will come

(John 14:26, 27) . . .. ²⁷ I leave you peace; I give you my peace. I do not give it to you the way that the world gives it. Do not let your hearts be troubled nor let them shrink out of fear.

(Colossians 3:15-17) ¹⁵ Also, let the peace of the Christ rule in your hearts, for you were called to that peace in one body. And show yourselves thankful. ¹⁶ Let the word of the Christ reside in you richly in all wisdom. Keep on teaching and encouraging one another with psalms, praises to God, spiritual songs sung with gratitude, singing in your hearts to Jehovah. ¹⁷ Whatever it is that you do in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, thanking God the Father through him.

(1 Corinthians 4:5) ⁵ Therefore, do not judge anything before the due time, until the Lord comes. He will bring the secret things of darkness to light and make known the intentions of the hearts, and then each one will receive his praise from God.

(Matthew 24:9-14) ⁹ “Then people will hand you over to tribulation and will kill you, and you will be hated by all the nations on account of my name. ¹⁰ Then, too, many will be stumbled and will betray one another and will hate one another. ¹¹ Many false prophets will arise and mislead many; ¹² and because of the increasing of lawlessness, the love of the greater number will grow cold. ¹³ But the one who has endured to the end will be saved. ¹⁴ And this good news of the Kingdom will be preached in all the inhabited earth for a witness to all the nations, and then the end will come.

(Isaiah 65:17) ¹⁷ For look! I am creating new heavens and a new earth; And the former things will not be called to mind, Nor will they come up into the heart.

(Revelation 21:1-4) 21 And I saw a new heaven and a new earth; for the former heaven and the former earth had passed away, and the sea is no more. ² I also saw the holy city, New Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God and prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. ³ With that I heard a loud voice from the throne say: “Look! The tent of God is with mankind, and he will reside with them, and they will be his people. And God himself will be with them. ⁴ And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.”

(Isaiah 65:24) ²⁴ Even before they call out, I will answer; While they are yet speaking, I will hear.

(1 John 3:13-16) ¹³ Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you. ¹⁴ We know that we have passed over from death to life, because we love the brothers. The one who does not love remains in death. ¹⁵ Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has everlasting life remaining in him. ¹⁶ By this we have come to know love, because that one surrendered his life for us, and we are under obligation to surrender our lives for our brothers.

(2 Samuel 19:5-7) ⁵ Then Joʹab went in to the king at the house and said: “Today you have put to shame all your servants who this day saved your life and the lives of your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your concubines. ⁶ You love those who hate you and hate those who love you, for you have made it clear today that your chiefs and servants mean nothing to you, because I am sure that if only Abʹsa·lom were alive today and the rest of us were dead, it would be all right with you. ⁷ Now get up, go out and reassure your servants, because by Jehovah I swear that if you do not go out, not a man will remain with you tonight. This will be worse for you than all the injury that has come upon you from your youth until now.”

(Isaiah 49:25, 26) ²⁵ But this is what Jehovah says: “Even the captives of a mighty man will be taken away, And those captured by the tyrant will be rescued. I will oppose those who oppose you, And I will save your own sons. ²⁶ I will make those who mistreat you eat their own flesh, And as with sweet wine, they will become drunk with their own blood. And all people will have to know that I am Jehovah, Your Savior and your Repurchaser, The Powerful One of Jacob.”

(John 5:27-29) . . .. ²⁸ Do not be amazed at this, for the hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice ²⁹ and come out, those who did good things to a resurrection of life, and those who practiced vile things to a resurrection of judgment.

(Matthew 7:24-27) ²⁴ “Therefore, everyone who hears these sayings of mine and does them will be like a discreet man who built his house on the rock. ²⁵ And the rain poured down and the floods came and the winds blew and lashed against that house, but it did not cave in, for it had been founded on the rock. ²⁶ Furthermore, everyone hearing these sayings of mine and not doing them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. ²⁷ And the rain poured down and the floods came and the winds blew and struck against that house, and it caved in, and its collapse was great.”

(Romans 8:37-39) . . .. ³⁸ For I am convinced that neither death nor life nor angels nor governments nor things now here nor things to come nor powers ³⁹ nor height nor depth nor any other creation will be able to separate us from God’s love that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

(1 Peter 5:6-11) ⁶ Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you in due time, ⁷ while you throw all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you. ⁸ Keep your senses, be watchful! Your adversary, the Devil, walks about like a roaring lion, seeking to devour someone. ⁹ But take your stand against him, firm in the faith, knowing that the same kind of sufferings are being experienced by the entire association of your brothers in the world. ¹⁰ But after you have suffered a little while, the God of all undeserved kindness, who called you to his everlasting glory in union with Christ, will himself finish your training. He will make you firm, he will make you strong, he will firmly ground you. ¹¹ To him be the might forever. Amen.

(Psalm 34:18) ¹⁸ Jehovah is close to the brokenhearted; He saves those who are crushed in spirit.

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